MILF in the Classroom

While showing the Iron Giant during my 11th grade US History Cold War lesson: Me: Can anyone give me words to describe Annie Hughes? Hogarth’s mother? Female Student: Hard working! Another Female Student: Single mom… Male Student: MILF!!!

How do you pronounce Qatar?

Like this? or like this?

Princess Beatrice’s Wedding Hat

Inspired by Princess Beatrice’s ridiculous Royal Wedding Hat

2010: Props and Poops – in no particular order

Prop: The Lame Duck Congress This has been one of the most productive lame duck Congresses in American history.. and the session wasn’t all bitter axe grinding as lame duck sessions tend to be. The repeal of Don’t Ask Don’t tell was epic, although long overdue. The START Treaty with Russia will probably be helpful. [...]

The Hippie Goes to the Opera (Part One)

I went to the Opera once. I don’t even remember what it was. It was shortly after I’d seen the Who in the fifth row and so I couldn’t hear too well, even though I was in the fifth row at the opera. Even though it was sung in English (a real no no as [...]

This is EXACTLY How I Feel

Thank you Rufus.

Musical Constipation

Ever wake up in the morning when you could be sleeping in, or trying to get to sleep at night but some dumb fucking song just keeps going through your head. Usually you only know, like, a few words of it and those are the ones that keep looping over and over? Welcome to my [...]

If You’re not Cheating, Are You Still Trying?

The quote “If you’re not cheating, you’re not trying” is often misused. Jim Rome uses it a lot on his radio show. According “Jungle” lore, it was most famously used by a pro baseball coach who used it to encourage his team’s base runners to lead off bases more to and consequently steal more bases. [...]

ka f*&king BOOM

I’ve always wanted a fireplace in my back yard, but zoning ordinances and safety considerations always stood in my way. Finally, because of a narrow loophole in our town’s fire code, I can walk through town with my head held high knowing I’m not breaking the law by having a fire in my back yard, [...]

Blue Jays at Play

Every morning just after sunrise and before the cats wake up the morning crew of Blue Jays comes to hang out. They’re very cranky to one another, almost like the older folks in Le Marais for whom crankiness becomes a sign of affection. Hey… I have a little bit of Paris on my deck! Blue [...]